So...
After meeting with my doctor, the inital diagnosis is Panic Disorder w/o Agoraphobia and Non-specific Personality Disorder, meaning I'm showing traits of multiple different personality disorders.
I will be engaging in talk therapy and have been prescribed Zoloft to deal with the depression and anxiety. Unfortunately that will take a few weeks to really get into my system and I have to just deal with the attacks until then. Which sucks. I'm coming out of one now, and it started on my way home this afternoon. I'm fully aware they're happening, and there is absolutely nothing I can do to prevent them. I can still function, kind of like "going through the motions" of life, and it takes a bit of effort.
The fear and paranoia were almost overwhelming this time. I found myself hunched up as if I were cold. Spooky. I'm having some difficulty writing this, as I am now very tired; this I have found is normal after an attack. I know there's a depression component there, and I know I expend huge amounts of energy fighting it.
After I got home I logged into WoW in the hope of shaking it, but I'm not in the mood (for WoW; I'm definitely in the mood of shaking this thing). So I've decided on a movie for now. J.J. Abrams' reboot of Star Trek is serving as a nice distraction. Great flick.
In the end I will likely nap. I'm tired...so tired...
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