Good evening.
I'm tired. I'm physically tired, I'm emotionally tired, and I'm mentally tired.
I'm tired of doing the same thing, over and over, expecting a different result.
I'm tired of all the crap going on outside my sphere of influence. I'm tired of the morons who pretend to run this country telling us what we need when these guys can only quickly pass legislation that affects their paychecks.
I'm tired of the mainstream media ignoring the transgressions of their own while blasting their opposition.
Some say that to achieve some semblance of serenity, you must ignore that which you can't control, and I can't control anything outside my sphere of influence. The problem with that stance is if you don't know what's going on around you, you aren't prepared for anything.
I'm tired of all of it.
I think I'll go to sleep.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Monday, March 5, 2012
One Year Removed...
Wow.
Today marks day 364. As in 364 days ago, I started this blog. This is, without a doubt one of the smallest, most insignificant wastes of space on the Internet. Enjoy!
As I reflect on the last 364, because I do that so much, I realize that not much has changed. I mean, I have gotten a little older. Hopefully a little wiser. Definitely a little crazier. I'm hoping for a lot wealthier, but I'm not holding my breath.
My life really hasn't changed much. I am in therapy, which is a good thing. My home is almost no longer my home, which may be a good thing, depending on what my options will be. I am still socially retarded. I still play World of Warcraft when I'm not at work or running errands. "I'm William Shatner, and I'm a Shaman!"
I am probably less paranoid than I was a year ago, but that's only because I'm thoroughly convinced that something catastrophic will happen in the United States of America in the next 9 months, and am also thoroughly convinced that the Mayans have nothing to do with it. No, this will be a disaster that has been many, many years in the making. Everything else going on around it will merely be subtext. Still hoping I'm wrong here, but not feeling it.
Oh, well. Only an hour(ish) unitl I get to play WoW again. Damn, I'm pathetic :P
Today marks day 364. As in 364 days ago, I started this blog. This is, without a doubt one of the smallest, most insignificant wastes of space on the Internet. Enjoy!
As I reflect on the last 364, because I do that so much, I realize that not much has changed. I mean, I have gotten a little older. Hopefully a little wiser. Definitely a little crazier. I'm hoping for a lot wealthier, but I'm not holding my breath.
My life really hasn't changed much. I am in therapy, which is a good thing. My home is almost no longer my home, which may be a good thing, depending on what my options will be. I am still socially retarded. I still play World of Warcraft when I'm not at work or running errands. "I'm William Shatner, and I'm a Shaman!"
I am probably less paranoid than I was a year ago, but that's only because I'm thoroughly convinced that something catastrophic will happen in the United States of America in the next 9 months, and am also thoroughly convinced that the Mayans have nothing to do with it. No, this will be a disaster that has been many, many years in the making. Everything else going on around it will merely be subtext. Still hoping I'm wrong here, but not feeling it.
Oh, well. Only an hour(ish) unitl I get to play WoW again. Damn, I'm pathetic :P
Monday, January 30, 2012
Same Shit, Different Year
Disclaimer: If the profanity in the title offends you, maybe you should find a different blog to read.
So, one day shy of one month down in the new year, and things aren't any different.
Today really sucked ass. I had a nice, hour-long anxiety attack while medicated. Which is just super. The worst thing about them is I know they're happening, but can't do anything to stop it. I tried breathing exercises. Nope. I tried talking myself down. Nope. Fucking frustrating.
The plus side, and believe it or not there is one, is as of next Monday, I will be under an honest to goodness health care plan, courtesy of the VA. I applied for medical benefits today, and my application was accepted, based on my combat veteran status. So war apparently isn't all bad, at least for me.
I am really looking forward to this blog becoming funny. Looking back on it, it is REALLY freaking dreary. It does help me to put this down in written form, but I wonder if it helps anybody else. Or if anybody else is reading. If they are, I hope it does help, if only to give you a comparison so you can say "damn, I'm glad I'm not THAT guy."
Anyway, I'm going to bed. Yeah, I'm an animal; 9:40 PM and I'm ready to drop.
Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
So, one day shy of one month down in the new year, and things aren't any different.
Today really sucked ass. I had a nice, hour-long anxiety attack while medicated. Which is just super. The worst thing about them is I know they're happening, but can't do anything to stop it. I tried breathing exercises. Nope. I tried talking myself down. Nope. Fucking frustrating.
The plus side, and believe it or not there is one, is as of next Monday, I will be under an honest to goodness health care plan, courtesy of the VA. I applied for medical benefits today, and my application was accepted, based on my combat veteran status. So war apparently isn't all bad, at least for me.
I am really looking forward to this blog becoming funny. Looking back on it, it is REALLY freaking dreary. It does help me to put this down in written form, but I wonder if it helps anybody else. Or if anybody else is reading. If they are, I hope it does help, if only to give you a comparison so you can say "damn, I'm glad I'm not THAT guy."
Anyway, I'm going to bed. Yeah, I'm an animal; 9:40 PM and I'm ready to drop.
Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
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